What's today, Thursday...?
Apr. 17th, 2003 09:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
juliebataOk, so, the other night, I was sitting on the couch wide awake at 3am, with a shooting pain in my stomach. My LJ friends are telling me, "hey, get that looked into." Usually, the heartburn goes away during daylight hours, but on Wednesday, it didn't. It suddenly occurred to me, "oh yeah, I've got insurance now." I call and describe my symptoms. I'm told, "why don't you come in this afternoon?"
A few months ago, people at work were complaining because the insurance co-pay went up to $10. I don't know what it was before, but their whining pissed me off. I spent the last two years uninsured and denying myself medical care because I just couldn't afford it. $10 is nothing compared to the $5000 emergency hospital bill I'm still paying off. I'm trying to get used to the fact that I can just go see a doctor if I have a problem.
So anyway, I go in and tell them what's going on. They take some blood to see if there's some sort of infection in my stomach lining. I'm given two nuclear powered acid-blocking medications. I like them very much. If it turns out I have an infection, I'll get antibiotics, too. Won't know for a couple of days. I slept much better Wednesday night...
I did manage to kill the spider. There is something hard-wired into me that hates spiders. It cannot be changed. I will always fear them, I don't WANT to like them, I don't care what beneficial things they might do. Any spider that gets into my home will die. I love snakes, though. Snakes are cool. Go figure...
I think that if I suddenly liked spiders, it would fundamentally change who I am. The world will have to accept me with my arachniphobia.
Medical breakthroughs are starting to happen that could someday allow me to eat peanuts without dying. It could be useful for when they've been eaten accidentally, but I can't imagine ever wanting to eat them, or enjoying their flavor. Being allergic is part of my everyday life. The smell of peanuts strikes fear in my heart, a deep down, life-threatening sense of danger. It's hard to picture that being different.
I cannot imagine believing in god.
I cannot imagine wanting a child.
I cannot imagine liking country music.
I cannot believe I've been rambling on like this for so long without a point. Oh yeah, um, I hate spiders, and I'm going to kill them. Some people can't change certain things, and we have to try to love them anyway.
This is one of those posts I'm going to be embarrassed about later.... Hey- There's my navel, I'm going to go contemplate it...
-Juliebata
A few months ago, people at work were complaining because the insurance co-pay went up to $10. I don't know what it was before, but their whining pissed me off. I spent the last two years uninsured and denying myself medical care because I just couldn't afford it. $10 is nothing compared to the $5000 emergency hospital bill I'm still paying off. I'm trying to get used to the fact that I can just go see a doctor if I have a problem.
So anyway, I go in and tell them what's going on. They take some blood to see if there's some sort of infection in my stomach lining. I'm given two nuclear powered acid-blocking medications. I like them very much. If it turns out I have an infection, I'll get antibiotics, too. Won't know for a couple of days. I slept much better Wednesday night...
I did manage to kill the spider. There is something hard-wired into me that hates spiders. It cannot be changed. I will always fear them, I don't WANT to like them, I don't care what beneficial things they might do. Any spider that gets into my home will die. I love snakes, though. Snakes are cool. Go figure...
I think that if I suddenly liked spiders, it would fundamentally change who I am. The world will have to accept me with my arachniphobia.
Medical breakthroughs are starting to happen that could someday allow me to eat peanuts without dying. It could be useful for when they've been eaten accidentally, but I can't imagine ever wanting to eat them, or enjoying their flavor. Being allergic is part of my everyday life. The smell of peanuts strikes fear in my heart, a deep down, life-threatening sense of danger. It's hard to picture that being different.
I cannot imagine believing in god.
I cannot imagine wanting a child.
I cannot imagine liking country music.
I cannot believe I've been rambling on like this for so long without a point. Oh yeah, um, I hate spiders, and I'm going to kill them. Some people can't change certain things, and we have to try to love them anyway.
This is one of those posts I'm going to be embarrassed about later.... Hey- There's my navel, I'm going to go contemplate it...
-Juliebata
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no subject
Date: 2003-04-17 10:31 pm (UTC)I cannot imagine wanting a child.
I cannot imagine liking country music.
Hmmm, I've said once before that you write things I can relate to. I'm sorta new in your world and I don't know if you've noticed my presence but I just wanted to say "Hi!"
Your comments about the world needing to learn to deal with your feelings about spiders struck a chord in me. Not that I share your spider-feelings, (those guys get to live in my house if they stay on the walls), but I've recently realized that my non-standard social orientation is simply me and I"m done worrying about how the world accepts it. (I'd go into detail about that if need be but it's only tangential to this post.)
I forgot if I had more to say on this. I'm rapidly eating up my limited sleep-time and I have a big day tomorrow so I better get outta here and go to sleep. Good luck with the heartburn thing!
Hi!
I'm wondering what I sound like to someone who doesn't know me at all. My LJ friends list is a hodge-podge of close friends, far flung acquaintances, friends-of-friends, and random strangers. I'm sure I come across quite differently to each one.
Through LJ, I've talked to some people who have radically different viewpoints than I do. That's OK, I can still enjoy hearing about their lives, and try to be supportive when things go wrong. As long as no-one expects me to babysit their pet tarantula, we'll get along fine!
-Juliebata
Re: Hi!
Date: 2003-04-18 02:59 pm (UTC)None of my tangible-life friends is on my LJ list. (I use the term tangible life in place of real-life because the use of real-life seems to place on-line interactions to an inferior level that I don't think they deserve). I don't even know if any of my tangible friends has an online presence. I guess I'm ahead of the curve in my corner of the world since few of my friends care for email or blogging.
As for my LJ friends, they are probably as far-flung and unique as yours. I think I even have some "country" kind of people here, but so far we get along. ;-) My LJ seems to be searching for an identity and purpose but I doubt it's gonna find one; I've had it for over a year and still can't get a feel for what I'd want it to be. Just like me I suppose.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-17 11:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-18 11:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-18 02:27 pm (UTC)I'm right there with that one!
no subject
Date: 2003-04-18 09:45 pm (UTC)Glad to hear you are sleeping better.
Whee! Copay.
Date: 2003-04-19 09:13 am (UTC)In a market research poll this week, they asked me how often I listened to country music in the last month. I said once, because I was awake when they played Patsy Cline's "Crazy" last weekend.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-23 04:18 pm (UTC)See you at Corflu? (I do plan on Wiscon, but that's a month away.)
later, ...
Corflu...
-Juliebata